Collection: Blog

What The Aunties Did - October 2016


As always we bought food for the refuge, and for women in the community. We also bought some baby clothes, and Warehouse vouchers so a family of kids who have had a very tough time – and who had been uplifted from an unsafe place with absolutely nothing - could have something brand new to wear. Sometimes it feels really good for kids to go shopping for something that no-one else has ever worn before.Auntie Phil took some clothes...
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#refugexmas


Yes! It's that time of year again!  For the last three years, The Aunties have done Xmas for the refuge. We've  given 200 kids presents, we have provided 75 women (and the refuge staff) with luxury gift baskets, and  run ourselves ragged in the spirit of joy and giving.So this year, we are going even bigger. What can you do to help? Simple! There are two very easy ways of making Xmas special for a whole lot of people.You...
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What The Aunties Did - September 2016


Over the last four weeks, this is what the Aunties have done with everyone’s donations of money and stuff…We paid for a person to have counselling, and also spent $550 to fix a car that was vital for getting kids to school on the other side of the city from the safe place they are staying right now.We paid the power and the phone bill for one of the women who is no longer in refuge and was in...
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What the Aunties Did: August 2016


Thanks to you – your donations of dollars, and your donations of stuff – this is what the Aunties did this August.When women leave unsafe places, they often leave with nothing. This month we were able to buy $1000 worth of Gift Cards to give to women in the Refuge (or who are leaving Refuge) to buy things they need from the Warehouse. And we bought $750 worth of Pak’n’Save vouchers to help women fill their cupboards when they...
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The Aunties: the first meeting of the Board of Trustees


Last night, something happened that I hadn't imagined happening ever,  in the last 3 years. I didn't start this with any set plan in place, let alone any plans at all. And as we went on, I started to realise that this is what I wanted to do. I originally involved other people, started calling them the Aunties a long time ago now, in the scheme of things, and things have expanded at a faster rate than I had...
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Aunties Speak


It is my extraordinary privilege to have curated a group of people, in the last three years, I call the Aunties. Some have been involved with my refuge work from the beginning, and some are recent arrivals. Irregardless, they are all beautiful souls and I appreciate them so much. Most are met via Twitter, some email me out of the blue, some are friends of friends, or family members of friends/Aunties. Whoever they are, they are important. They often...
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Being a woman


There has been much written about being a cis woman in this world. What that means, and what it feels like. I always think about this - about how men would cope if they had to live with the fear, the constant compromise, minimising of our circumstance and what happens to us. What would happen if men had to deal daily with the wearing, tedious sexism. A lot of women don't even comment on it anymore, and some don't...
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Trigger Warning: Taking power back.


This is not my story. It belongs to a very brave woman. It is her story of one night in her life. It's extremely graphic and may trigger you, so please be careful of yourselves.  "I was feeling pretty stressed. It was Summer holidays sure, but lately I had been so stressed, and also so relieved. Relieved that I was now able to make my own life. Stressed that my ex seemed intent on doing whatever it took to disrupt...
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What domestic violence looks like.


For the last twenty years, I've been figuring out what abusive relationships look like. As a teacher dealing with families, as someone connected to a refuge and getting to know the women therein, and as a friend, and often an ear for women who have left these relationships or are still in the midst thereof.Being an avid user of social media, meeting all sorts of people, and having these conversations around domestic violence day in and day out for...
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The elephant in the room


There's an elephant in the room. Nobody talks about it and when they do, there's uncomfortable silence and uncertainty about what to do. Its a big old elephant - the subject of domestic violence in the relationships of people you know.i think, as a society, we are uncomfortable with the thought that intimate partner violence is so endemic, that people we know are victims and survivors of it, and people we know are the abusers.I support a refuge in...
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Manākitanga


One of the Aunties recently alerted me to her neighbour, an older woman who is looking after her grandchild. I asked for this woman to email me to tell us what she’s looking for. She very bravely has reached out today, and told me her story, and I can think we can help her, so I would beg your indulgence on this matter. As you know, this year is the year that I formalise the Auntie’s standing. Part of the reason for doing...
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Yearly gratitude


Its that  time  when I say thank you to all those people who have made #whaeapower tick throughout the year. Who answer my emails with alacrity, and who make sure that the women in the refuge have everything they may need. Giving money for drivers licenses, food, toiletries and undies, and even a van;  buying pressies for birthdays and Xmas; making meals for the women to share; bringing me clothes and shoes; sending me beauty products and Barbie dolls; supplying...
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